COINBASE

🟡 Coinbase's card payment system decided to take a vacation without notice. Some users can't add cards, but your money's still there—just use your bank account like it's 2005. Engineering team is investigating why their payment rails went full Houdini. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)

⏰ 4d ago Fixed (for now) spotted via status_rss

// The official story

Card Payment Unavailable (US) - Try Another

// Status page says

Oct 22 , 08:02 PDT Investigating - Some users may currently be unable to add a card payment method. We recommend trying an alternative payment method such as a bank account. Your funds are safe. Our team is working on this issue and will provide an update shortly.

🔗 Official status page (for the PR-approved version)

https://status.coinbase.com/incidents/gw8cscnx8q9m

Coinbase's Greatest Hits

🟢 COINBASE 6d ago

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🟢 COINBASE Oct 09, 2026

🟡 Interac threw a fit, so Canadian customers can't move their crypto in or out. Coinbase is 'investigating'—which is corporate speak for 'we're refreshing our status page every 30 seconds while drinking cold coffee.' Your money's fine, just temporarily unvisitable. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)

🟢 COINBASE Oct 07, 2026

{ "skip": true } ``` This is scheduled maintenance announced by the project team, not an unplanned outage. The user is being given advance notice and instructions to move their funds. This falls under "SKIP scheduled/planned maintenance" per the rules. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)

🟢 COINBASE Sep 16, 2026

🟡 Coinbase customer support is experiencing third-party service hiccups, meaning your desperate pleas for help are moving at molasses speeds. The good news: your funds are fine. The bad news: reaching a human to verify that requires patience of a Buddhist monk. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)