ELASTIC

🟡 Elastic's AutoOps can't find its node metrics (CPU, memory, disk) in certain regions—they're just gone from recent time ranges. The good news: your data's fine, cluster health is fine, everything else is fine. It's just the one thing you need to see that's MIA. ETA on the scavenger hunt: 2 hours. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)

⏰ Sep 17, 2026 Fixed (for now) spotted via status_rss

// The official story

AutoOps node metrics temporarily unavailable in some regions

// Status page says

Sep 17 , 15:50 UTC Investigating - We are investigating reports of missing node-level metrics (CPU, memory, disk, thread pools) for recent time ranges in a subset of AutoOps regions. This may appear as a "No data" message on the Nodes view. Cluster health, shard, and deployment data are unaffected, and no data loss has occurred. We will provide an update within the next 2 hours or earlier.

🔗 Official status page (for the PR-approved version)

https://status.elastic.co/incidents/xjzy86843t92

Elastic's Greatest Hits

🟢 ELASTIC 5d ago

🟡 Elastic's GCP us-central1 region decided projects should come with a 'read receipts disabled' feature. Some Serverless deployments are either moving at geological timescales or vanishing entirely. The status page says 'investigating' which is tech speak for 'we're refreshing our monitors and hoping it fixes itself.'. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)

🟢 ELASTIC Sep 16, 2026

🟡 Elastic's own support portal decided to become unsupported. The company that helps you monitor everything apparently turned off monitoring for, well, everything. They're 'investigating' with their provider—translation: playing hot potato with blame while customers scream into the void. (Auto-resolved: no updates in 24h)

⚪ ELASTIC Aug 27, 2026

⚪ Someone deployed a DNS config change that yeet'd .apm endpoints into the void. Serverless customers got the silent treatment for ~9 hours until engineers remembered these endpoints existed. Elastic's internal DNS provider apparently needed a nap.

⚪ ELASTIC Jul 21, 2026

⚪ 🔍 Elastic's monitoring agents decided to practice the strong, silent type for three days straight. Turns out metrics weren't flowing anywhere—just vibes and prayers. The patient is stable now, but AutoOps dashboards are looking patchier than a conspiracy theorist's evidence board.